Saturday, April 9, 2011

From ‘The Four Agreements. A Toltec Wisdom book’ by Don Miguel Ruiz

We try to please Mom and Dad, we try to please the teachers at school, we try to please the church, and so we start acting. We pretend to be what we are not because we are afraid of being rejected. The fear of being rejected becomes the fear of not being good enough. Eventually we become someone that we are not.

The human being is the only animal on earth that pays a thousand times for the same mistake. The rest of the animals pay once for every mistake they make. But not us. We have a powerful memory. We make a mistake, we judge ourselves, we find ourselves guilty, and we punish ourselves. ……. If we have a wife or husband he or she also reminds us of the mistake, so we can judge ourselves again, punish ourselves again, and find ourselves guilty again. Is this fair?

Your whole mind is a fog which the Toltecs called a mitote (pronounced MIH-TOE’-TAY). Your mind is a dream where a thousand people talk at the same time, and nobody understands each other. This is the condition of the human mind – a big mitote, and with that big mitote you cannot see what you really are. In India they call the mitote, maya, which means illusion. It is the personality’s notion of “I am”. Everything you believe about yourself and the world, all the concepts and programming you have in your mind, all are the mitote. We cannot see who we truly are; we cannot see that we are not free.

That is why humans resist life. To be alive is the biggest fear humans have ……… Just being ourselves is the biggest fear of humans. We have learned to live by other people’s points of view because of the fear of not being accepted and of not being good enough for someone else. ……. Trying to be good enough for them, we create an image of perfection, but we don’t fit this image ….. Not being perfect we reject ourselves ……. We try to hide ourselves, and we pretend to be what we are not. The result is that we feel unauthentic and wear social masks to keep others from noticing this. We are so afraid that somebody else will notice that we are not what we pretend to be.

In your whole life nobody has ever abused you more than you have abused yourself.

You need a very strong will in order to adopt The Four Agreements – but if you begin to live your life with these agreements, the transformation in your life will be amazing.

The First Agreement – Be Impeccable With Your Word

…… your intent manifests through the word. …… Impeccability means “without sin”. Impeccable comes from the Latin pecatus, which means “sin”. The im in impeccable means “without,” so impeccable means “without sin.” ……… Mostly we use the word to spread our personal poison – to express anger, jealousy, envy, and hate. ……. Gossiping has become the main form of communication in human society. …… Use the word in the correct way. Use the word to share your love.

The Second Agreement – Don’t Take Anything Personally

When you take things personally, then you feel offended, and your reaction is to defend your beliefs and create conflicts ……. You also try hard to be right by giving them your own opinions. ……. by taking things personally you set yourself up to suffer for nothing. …… The whole world can gossip about you, and if you don’t take it personally you are immune.

The Third Agreement – Don’t Make Assumptions
The problem with making assumptions is that we believe they are the truth. ……. we believe we are right about the assumptions; then we defend our assumptions and try to make someone else wrong. ……. We only see what we want to see, and hear what we want to hear ……. We literally dream things up in our imaginations.

The Fourth Agreement – Always Do Your Best

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