The body feels the pain. That’s a very painful process. ….It is a physical pain because the body has limitations ……The energy that is in operation there does not feel the limitations of the body; it is not interested; it has its own momentum. It is a very painful thing. It is not that ecstatic, blissful beatitude and all that rubbish stuff and nonsense! ….. Even Ramana Maharshi suffered after that.
A great cascade – not one, but thousands of cascades – it went on and on for months and months. …..
There were pains all over the body. Thought has controlled this body to such an extent that when that loosens, the whole metabolism is agog. ….there were pains in the marrow of the bones. Every cell started changing. And it went on and on for six months.
And then the sex hormones started changing. I didn’t know whether I was man or a woman ….Suddenly there was a breast on the left-hand side. All kinds of things, it went on and on and on. It took three years for this body to fall into a new rhythm of its own.
Since there is nobody who uses this thought as a self-protective mechanism, it burns itself up. Thought undergoes combustion, ionisations ….. Thought is, after all vibration. So, when this kind of ionization of thought takes place, it throws out, sometimes it covers the whole body with, an ash-like substance.
If I cover the eyelids, there is still light inside. There seems to be some kind of a hole in the forehead, which doesn’t show, but through which something penetrates. In India, that light is golden: in Europe it is blue. There is also some kind of light penetration through the back of the neck. It’s as if there is a hole running through between those spots in front and back of the skull. There is nothing inside but this light. If you cover those points, there is complete, total darkness. This light doesnt do anything or help the body to function in any way – its just there.
The thymus, one of the endocrine glands, is located under the breastbone ….it is active through childhood until puberty and then becomes dormant. When you come into your natural state, this gland is reactivated. Sensations are felt there; you don’t translate them as ‘good’ or ‘bad’; they are just a thud.
In the natural state there is no entity that is co-ordinating the messages from different senses. Each sense is functioning independently in its own way. When there is a demand from outside which makes it necessary to co-ordinate one or two or all of the senses and come up with a response, still there is no co-ordinator, but there is a temporary state of co-ordination. There is no continuity; when the demand has been met, again there is only the uncoordinated, disconnected, disjointed functioning of the senses. ….Once the continuity is blown apart – not that it was ever there; but the illusory continuity – its finished once and for all.
…it is thought that provides the build-up without which no sex is possible. …. In the natural state there is no build up of thought. Without that build up, sex is impossible. And sex is tremendously violent to the body. The body is normally a very peaceful organism, and then you subject it to this tremendous tension and release. Which feels pleasurable to you. Actually it is painful to the body.
What makes one person come into his natural state, and not another person. I don’t know. Perhaps its written in the cells. It is acausal. There is absolutely nothing you can do.
…..the animal becomes a flower. That seems to be the purpose – if at all there is any purpose in Nature ….We have only a handful of flowers, which you can count on your fingers: Ramana Maharshi in recent times, Sri Ramakrishna, some other people …..
These glands are outside the control of thought. The Hindus call them ‘chakras’. The glands are located in the exact spots where they speculated the chakras are……. I don’t want to use the word ‘chakras’. I would call them ‘ductless glands’. Unless they are activated, any chance of human beings flowering into themselves is lost
You have to become completely disillusioned, then the truth begins to express itself in its own way.
So all your morality, and all your practicing this, that and the other, has no meaning. That is why the Upanishadic seers never talked of morality or sadhana, whereas the saints have emphasized them because they are second-class imitators……. And I maintain that it is genetically fixed: only in such a man does this kind of thing happen.